


Wildest Dreams

by YamiAki96



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Genie/Djinn, Angst, Best Friend Sam, Dreams, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-20
Updated: 2015-01-25
Packaged: 2018-03-02 07:35:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2804636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YamiAki96/pseuds/YamiAki96
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel is kidnapped by Djinn. Sam is surprised by what his dream world holds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Cas had been missing for two days.

 

He had insisted on going on the Djinn hunt with Sam and Dean, saying that just because he was human didn’t mean he was useless. Dean had finally relented when he got annoyed enough, as long as Cas kept his mouth shut and stuck to them like glue.

 

They knew Cas was smart, that he could fight and take care of himself, but that was when he was an angel. He still had to learn how to do what he did in his newly human body. And his people skills sucked.

 

The Djinn had separated them, though, and it had taken Cas. Dean had called for him until he was hoarse, and searched the building for three hours, but he was gone.

 

"Son of a bitch!" Sam flinched as Dean slammed another book down on the table.

 

"Dean, we’ll find him, just relax."

 

"Relax! He could be sucked dry by now, Sam!"

 

"You know he’s not. The rate of disappearances is low. This Djinn his playing it safe, keeping them for as long as possible. Cas doesn’t even know what’s happening right now."

 

"Yeah. Yeah, I know. He’s probably dreaming about fluffy white clouds and halos." Dean opened the book. "Let’s just find this bastard, okay?

* * *

Castiel jerked awake with a loud gasp, looking around wildly. He relaxed when he saw that he was in his bedroom, in his bed.

 

“You okay?” He looked at Dean, who was watching him with sleepy eyes. The clock behind him read that it was just after two in the morning.

 

“Yes, I just had a bad dream.”

 

“Com’ere,” Dean held his arm up, lifting the covers and allowing Cas to burrow into his chest. He streched his arm out and snagged the stuffed giraffe from Cas’s side of the bed.

 

“Here.”

 

“Thank you, Dean.” Castiel tucked the snimal between them.

 

Dean had won it for him on their first date and since then, whenever Castiel was scared or sad, he held it and remembered Dean. It had been through his parent’s divorce, scary movies, thunderstorms and more. Castiel didn’t know if he could live without it.

 

“Clowns or midgits?”

 

“Worse,” Castiel said. “You didn’t love me.”

 

“You were dreaming, then.” Dean leaned down and pressed his lips to Cas’s for a moment. “I love more than anything.”

 

“I love you, too, Dean.”

 

Dean ran his fingers through Cas’s hair and smiled softly at him.

 

“Go back to sleep, babe. You got a busy day tomorrow.”

 

“Thanks for reminding me,” Cas sighed. The first day of school. New kids, new problems, more work. A whole year of changing happening in just a few months. He didn’t even have the same last name anymore.

 

“Anytime,” Dean snarked back. “Seriously though. If you back to sleep now, you may get up early enough for breakfast and a quickie before school.”

  
“the only two things on my back to school list,” Cas smiled. He pressed closer to Dean and closed his eyes, hoping his husband’s arms would keep the dreams away.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[ **(Based on my Tumblr post.)** ](http://yamiaki96fanfic.tumblr.com/post/103689121558/dont-imagine-cas-being-kidnapped-by-a-djinn)


	2. Chapter 2

The first day of school was always awful. New faces and names to remember, students that switched seats every day, students that dropped his class after three days. And his favorite part - trying to convince high school students that Shakespeare is cool and that Fifty Shades of Grey fanfiction wasn’t creative writing.

He arrived home at four thirty and collapsed on the couch. He didn’t move when Dean came home half an hour later. He let out a huff when Dean laid down on top of him.

He moved after a minute and Cas turned to look at him.

"How was your day?"

"Long," Cas answered, reaching to run his fingers through Dean’s hair. He leaned into the touch and looked at Cas with loving green eyes.

"Wanna go get some dinner?" Cas groaned.

"I don’t want to move."

"I’ll order in," Dean kissed his forehead, then went to the phone. Cas heard him talking and he thanked the person on the other end of the line.

"Come here," Cas opened his arms and Dean crawled on top of him again. He laid his head on his chest and sighed when Cas’s fingers found his hair.

They didn’t need to talk because they already knew what the other would say.

* * *

Dean slammed the car door when he got in, fuming.

Another empty building. Another waste of hours they needed.

"Dean-" Sam started.

"Don’t. Damn it!"

"We’ll find him."

"Sure we will. He’ll just be dead if we do."

"No, he won’t. We still have ten buildings, if we split up-"

"So that thing can take one of us? Definitely not."

"Dean, we know how to fight them and how to defend ourselves. Cas didn’t. If we split up, it won’t take nearly as long."

Dean was quiet for a long time. So long Sam started to get worried.

"Fine," He finally said.

They looked over their list of building and split them up between themselves.

"Call if you find him," Sam said.

"You, too. Be careful."

* * *

 

The months flew by and before Cas knew it, it was Christmas.

He and Dean had spent weeks looking for the perfect gifts for everyone and eventually they did.

A vacation for John and Mary to a nice beach house in the Outer Banks. Gift cards and money for Sam for school. New Magic Cards and a donation to Moondoor for Charlie.

Cas bought Dean a new jacket and some new tools for the garage. Dean got him some school supplies he’d been loathe to buy and several first edition books he’d been looking for.

Dean left the house early to help Mary make dinner, leaving Cas to grade his final exams in a silent house.

He joined them at the Winchester house at five. Dean met him under a doorway where mistletoe was hanging.

"Really?"

"It’s tradition, baby." They kissed and Cas went to help Mary set the table.

"I wish Sam could be here," Mary said. "But I’m glad he’s at school and that he’s doing okay."

"Me, too. We sent him his gift yesterday."

Mary touched his face in a motherly way that Castiel wasn’t a costumed to.

"I’m glad that Dean has you, Castiel. Thank you for taking care of him."

"Thank you for accepting me."

Mary smiled at him, and Castiel pulled her into a hug. She stepped back when the doorbell rang.

"I wonder who that could be," she said, wiping her hands on her apron.

Cas followed her down the hall, going to join John and Dean in the living room.

"Sam!" He paused at Mary’s excited shout.

Sure enough, the youngest Winchester was standing in the doorway, looking very confused.

He wrapped his arms tightly around his mother when she hugged him. Like he hadn’t seen her in years.

"Why didn’t you tell us you were coming!"

John and Dean joined them then, rushing to hug Sam and question his sudden appearance, but Castiel didn’t need to. He already new why Sam was there.

To take him home


	3. Chapter 3

“Dean, I found him!” Sam said into the phone as he tossed the dead Djinn aside. He pressed his fingers to Castiel’s pale neck, hoping. “He’s still alive.”

“You find the Djinn?” Dean asked. Sam heard the door to the Impala close and the engine start.

“I killed one. Cas isn’t waking up, though. It’s not the one that put him under.”

“There’s more than one.” It wasn’t question, but Sam answered anyway.

“Apparently. Can you get down here? It’s the abandoned school on Westover.”

“Yeah, I’ll be there as soon as I can.” Dean paused. “What are you going to do?”

“Block the door.” There was a loud bang when he knocked over the filing cabinet. He looked around for anything else heavy, but found nothing that he could use. “I’ll use the Dream Root and try to wake him up.”

“Do you think that’s a good idea?” Sam sighed. There was no telling what he was going to see. But he didn’t have a choice.

“It’s the only one we have.”

“Be careful,” Dean relented. “I’ll be there in twenty minutes.”

Sam hung up and pulled a chair out from under one of the desks. He placed it  beside Cas and began the spell. He drank the mixture and was knocked out almost instantly.

He woke up in a car outside of their old house in Lawrence. The Impala was parked in front of him. With nothing else to do, he got out of the car and walked to the door.

“Here goes nothing,” He said, then knocked. His mother answered with a smile on her face. It only brightened when she saw him.

“Sam!” She pulled him into a hug. She was solid and warm and felt like home. Sam hugged her tightly.

“Mom.”

“Come in before you get you sick. Why didn’t you tell us you were coming?”

John and Dean came in from the living room. John hugged him first. It was different than Sam remembered. His father’s had hugged him and Dean sometimes, but they always came after one of them almost died. This was just a welcome, something that they obviously did often.

Dean hugged him next. Sam saw Castiel standing in the hallway and their eyes met. They stared at each other over Dean’s shoulder.

“God, it’s good to see you,” Dean said, stepping back.

“You, too.” Dean smiled, then gestured to Castiel.

“You remember Cas, right?” Sam nodded, playing along.

“Yeah. Hey, Cas.”

“Hello, Sam,” Castiel answered, looking away.

“Well, come on in and get warmed up,” John said. “We have plenty of food.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

Sam watched as Dean wrapped an arm around Castiel’s waist and pulled him close.

“Did you know about this?” He asked. Castiel shook his head.

“I’m just as surprised as you are.” Dean kissed him.

Castiel knew that he should have stopped him, but he pulled him closer instead. If Sam was here, he wouldn’t have this much longer. Sam was staring at them when they broke apart. Cas couldn’t meet his eyes.

It was awkward, to say the least.

Dean was very affectionate, giving kisses and touches freely. He pulled Castiel against him when they moved to the living room, sitting him in his lap. They all talked and exchanged gifts (Sam found the ones he apparently bought in the trunk of his car) and it was nice.

When it started getting late, Dean offered Sam their guest room. Sam agreed and followed them back to their apartment building after saying goodbye to John and Mary.

Castiel disappeared into the room at the end of the hall, saying he was going for a shower while Dean showed Sam to the guest room and helped him settle in.

“Sorry it’s such a mess,” Dean said, moving some boxes into the small closet. “But you didn’t give us any heads up that you coming.”

“Yeah. Sorry, about that.”

“No problem,” Dean shrugged. “How have you been?”

“What do you mean?”

“Going back to school after so long, dating, stress. You’re not thinking about relapsing are you?”

 _Relapsing?_ “No. I’m done with that.”

“Good.” Dean pulled the sheets from the bed a replaced them with fresh ones he got out of the hall closet. Sam helped him fit them onto the mattress.

“Um, how are you and Cas?” He asked, unsure if he wanted an answer. Dean smiled.

“We’re good. He’s awesome, Sammy. The best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“You’re happy.” Dean smiled.

“We are.” He looked around the room and nodded to himself. “Alright. You need anything?”

“No, I think I’m good. Goodnight.”

“Night.” Dean stopped at the door and turned back. “It’s really good to see you, Sam. I’m glad you came home.” Sam didn’t know why those words tore him up inside, but he nodded.

“Me, too.”

Dean closed the door behind him. Sam sat on the bed, trying to wrap his head around what just happened.

Cas’s ideal world, his dream life, was being with Dean? They were married, John and Mary were alive, and Sam was apparently a recovering drug addict or something. He laid down and closed his eyes.

He would get Cas alone the next day and try to wake him up. He just hoped that he could do it.

**~*~**

Castiel laid his head on Dean’s chest while his husband ran his fingers through his hair and down his back.

“It’s good to see Sam,” Dean said.

“Yeah.” They laid in silence for a while. Dean had just started to doze when Castiel spoke. “Dean?”

“Hm?”

“When did you fall in love with me?”

“What?”

“When did you fall in love with me? Why did you fall in love with me?” Dean rubbed his eyes and sat up. Castiel moved with him.

“Um, Senior year, I guess. When Bobby made you my tutor.”

“Really?” Dean nodded. “I thought you hated me!”

“I did, a little. I was a jock, you know. I wanted to fool around and you wouldn’t put up with me shit. You knew I was smart and made me act that way. You’re probably the reason I graduated, to be honest. Then, during college, you called me every night to make sure I didn’t need help. You were my support system. When you came home for break I knew I had to act on the feelings I’d been holding back since you told me to stop acting like an idiot or risk missing my chance with you.” Castiel curled closer to him.

“I love you, Dean.”

“I love you, too.” Castiel closed his eyes and listened to Dean’s heartbeat. He had to savor this while he had it. Dean’s arms around him, Dean’s body against his. His lips, his eyes, his everything.

“Make love to me, Dean.”

“Sam’s right down the hall.”

“I don’t care. I need you.” Dean rolled over, hovering over him. He searched his face.

“Are you okay? You’ve been off since Sam got here.”

“Yes. I just want you so badly.” He touched Dean’s face, traced the lines that were starting to appear there. “I want to be as close to you as I can.” While I can.

Dean studied him for another long moment, then leaned down to kiss him, allowing his body to press against him.

Castiel fisted his fingers in Dean’s hair, fighting back tears.

How could he let this go?


	4. Chapter 4

Sam couldn’t get Cas alone all day.

Dean had taken off until after New Years so he was always around.

They all went out for breakfast to a diner that Dean and Cas frequented. Their waitress knew them by name and knew their orders. When Dean asked about school, Sam told old Stanford stories.

"You want to rent some movies," Dean asked Cas, nuzzling him. "Make a day of it?"

"Sure. Sam?"

"Sounds great."

They paid their bill and went back to Dean and Castiel’s apartment. They went to their respective bedroom and changed back into their pajamas. Castiel pulled Dean onto their bed and kissed him for a long time, savoring it.

"We can’t make out in front of Sam," He pointed out when Dean said they needed to get to the living room. That earned him five more minutes.

"You’re bringing your giraffe?" Dean asked when Castiel picked it up.

"Yes." Dean kissed him again, smiling.

Sam raised an eyebrow when he saw the animal. Castiel hugged it.

"I scare easy. I know how Winchesters love scary movies."

"A giraffe?"

"Dean won him for me. His name is Gerard."

"Dude, you’re thirty."

"I know. I just like him, okay? He’s like my safety blanket."

"Alright," Sam shrugged.

Castiel sat on the couch, pulling his legs up underneath him.

"I’m going to make popcorn. You guys pick something."

Sam waited until Dean was gone to sit next to Cas.

"Cas, I need to tell you something and I need you to listen."

"Alright."

"This isn’t real. None of it. Except for me and you." Castiel sighed.

"I know."

"No, Cas. That’s not De- you know?"

"Yes, Sam. I know."

"Then why aren’t you awake?" Cas shrugged and hugged the giraffe tighter to his chest. "You do want to wake up, don’t you?"

"No, I don’t."

"Cas, you can’t stay here. You’ll die."

"I know. I don’t care." Sam sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Cas, don’t make me do this."

"Do what?" Dean asked, coming back in.

"Nothing," Castiel answered. "Let’s watch the movie."

"I’m taking Cas home," Sam said. Maybe if the Djinn knew that they knew, he’d release Cas, or reveal himself in some way that ended the dream.

"What are you talking about, Sam. He is home."

"No, he’s not. Because this isn’t real." Dean looked confused for a moment, then saddened.

"Cas, go in the kitchen and call the doctor and the rehab center." Castiel stood up. Sam pulled his gun from his waistband. "Holy- what the fuck, Sam!"

He pulled Cas behind him, shielding him. His eyes were wide with fear and worry. His hands were up in surrender.

"Sammy, put the gun down, okay? Whatever it is you’re on, we can help you. Just put the gun down."

"I can’t. Because you’re not real, none of this is. Cas you know it’s not and you need to wake up."

"Please, Sam," Castiel whispered, wrapping his arms around Dean. "Please, stop. Leave me here."

"I can’t. You know I can’t. We need you."

"I’m a hindrance, Sam. I just mess everything up. Let me stay where I can do things right."

"It’s not real, Castiel. Come home and we’ll teach you."

Castiel buried his face between Dean’s shoulder blades for a second then let him go.

"Cas," Dean said, as he moved around him. "Baby, what are you doing?"

"He right, Dean."

"No, he’s not. He needs help, Cas, not you pleasing him while he’s like this."

"I know you’re not real." The dream wavered, Dean rippled a little. He touched Cas’s face.

"I am. Please don’t do this," He whispered. Castiel held the hand against his face. His voice cracked.

"I have to."

"You can’t leave me alone. I love you, Castiel."

"I know." The dream Dean stroked his face. "I love you, Dean. So much. But you aren’t my Dean."

He looked at his left hand and removed his rings. The one that Dean gave him the night he proposed and his wedding band. Dean sobbed when he put them in his palm and curled his fingers around them.

"Please, Cas. Please don’t do this. Stay here. Stay with me."

"Don’t watch," Castiel whispered. He kissed Dean’s cheek, then his mouth. "Goodbye, Dean."

He sat back on the couch and grabbed the giraffe. He closed his eyes and waited.

"No!" Dean shouted. "No, Sam-"

The gun went off.

~*~

Castiel woke up, gasping and shaking. Dean was right in front of him, looking concerned.

"You okay?" Castiel nodded. He was getting ready to wrap his around the other man when the concern turned to anger. "What the fuck, Cas! You let a djinn get the drop on you? Seriously?"

Castiel was shocked. He’d forgotten that this was Dean. He wasn’t gentle, they didn’t curl up in bed on the weekends an watch movies and make love. This Dean was strict, a soldier. He cared for Castiel, but he would never love him, not that way. That’s why Castiel had to hold it back.

"I’m sorry, Dean," He croaked. Dean sighed.

"Whatever. At least you’re alive. You okay, Sammy?"

"Yeah, I’m good." Castiel glanced over at Sam, then looked away.

"Come on. Let’s get you both to the car."

Castiel didn’t look at Sam. He wouldn’t accept his help, opting to stumble all the way to the Impala. Dean called it pride, but Sam knew. Cas hated him right now.

"Here," Dean said, giving Cas a bottle of water. "You need to hydrate."

"Thank you."

"So what did you see, Cas?" Dean asked, when the bottle was empty and the warehouse was miles and miles behind them.

"Huh?"

"When you were knocked out. What was it? You have your halo back or something?"

"Yes, Dean," Castiel said. "I was in heaven."

When they were back in the bunker, Castiel excused himself to shower and go to sleep. Sam followed him.

"Cas-"

"I don’t want to talk to you."

"Cas-"

"Please, Sam. It’s over. Just let it be over."

Castiel walked into his room and locked the door behind him.

He wished more than anything in the world, as he buried his face in his pillow and cried for the loss of something that he never had, that he had that stupid stuffed giraffe.


	5. Chapter 5

The Winchesters didn’t see much of Castiel in the weeks after waking up from the djinn dream. He barely left his room, and when he did he never spoke, he didn’t eat with them, and he barely touched what Dean left outside his room. He did ask Sam not to tell Dean anything about the dream, but that went without saying.

Dean shrugged it off, saying that he’d lighten up when he was ready, but Sam knew. Cas wasn’t going to get better with them around. He might not ever get better.

But, for all his hermit-ness while they home, everything they asked him to do was done. Cleaning, laundry, shopping, everything they hated to do. He was always locked away again when they arrived home.

After almost two months, Dean was sick of it. He dragged Cas out of his room to go out with them for the night. Castiel looked miserable in the backseat of the Impala, but he didn’t speak. Dean talked enough for all of them.

The bar he chose was loud and rough. When a pretty dark haired woman came by to take their orders, Dean started the flirting and smiling that he always did. Sam could only watch as Castiel curled in on himself. The waitress had to ask for his order three times the ex-angel was speaking so quietly.

“Do anything interesting while we were gone?” Dean asked. Cas shook his head. “Did you do anything besides curl up in your bed?”

“Dean,” Sam admonished.

“I sorted the Men of Letters files like you asked me to,” Castiel said, quietly.

“He speaks!”

“Dean, leave him alone.”

“No. It’s been two months, Cas. Whatever you saw, it wasn’t real. Get over it!” Castiel nodded.

“I’ll try. I’m sorry, Dean.”

The waitress came by then with their beers and shots. Castiel downed shot his before she finished passing everything out and put the glass back on her tray, asking if she could please bring him another. Dean and Sam stared at him, shocked.

There most have been some left over angel mojo in Cas. He drank twice the amount of Dean and Sam but was only a little tipsy. Dean didn’t mind because it kept the waitress coming back.

They left together at the end of her shift. Dean threw a “don’t wait up!” over his shoulder and Sam watched Cas’s face fall.

Sam didn’t know what to do when Castiel started crying on the way home.

“You okay, Cas?”

“My husband went home with someone else, Sam,” Castiel said. “I know he’s not mine here, but in my head I was married to him after having been together for years. So, no, I am not okay.”

Sam didn’t say anything else. What could he say? Sorry I ruined your dream to save your life. They didn’t speak again until they got back to the bunker.

Castiel went into the kitchen and dug through the cabinets until he found the bottle he was looking for.

“Dean’s going to be pissed that you’re drinking his stuff.”

“I don’t give a fuck.” Sam was gobsmacked at the word. Castiel took several gulps from the bottle before he looked at Sam.

“You should have let me die.”

“Don’t you ever say that!”

“I was happy, Sam!” Cas yelled, then sat down on the floor, looking sadder than ever. “I was happier than I have been since I fell. I had everything I wanted.” Cas pulled his knees up to his chest. “Do you have any idea what it feels like? To finally have what you always wanted and to have it ripped from you? To have the person you love more than anything constantly tear you apart after you’ve known what it was like to have them love you back? Because it hurts, Sam. It hurts so bad.”

Cas scrubbed viscously at the tears that had fallen from his eyes and tipped the bottle up again. Sam just stared. He’d had no idea Cas was hurting so badly.

“I’m sorry, Cas.” Castiel laughed bitterly.

“Yeah, I’m sure you are.”

“I couldn’t just let you die. We care about you.”

“If you cared about me you would have considered how I felt before you made me wake up!” Cas snapped. “When you saw what I was dreaming, you knew that it would never come true. You knew that I would see him with other people for the rest of my life. You didn’t care about what I was feeling or how I would feel later. If you did, you would have left me.”

Castiel got up and stumbled by Sam. The Winchester caught his wrist.

“I’m sorry, Cas.”

“Just leave me alone, Sam. “Just…” Castiel pulled his arm away and walked down the hall. His door slammed a moment later.

The next day, when Dean was bragging about his latest conquest, Castiel acted as he wasn’t dying inside.  

* * *

Castiel’s first hunt back on the job didn’t end well. Actually, it was the worst hunt they had had in a long time.

The monster was mutilating victims and leaving them in the woods. There were no missing organs and they weren’t drained of blood, so they weren’t really sure what they were dealing with

They finally got a lead after a girl had been missing for three days. Dean wanted to leave Cas at the motel, but the ex-angel wouldn’t have it.

“I’m fine. I want to help her.”

“Okay. But you stay behind us. We don’t need you to jumping the gun.”

“I won’t.”

Dean looked skeptical, but didn’t argue anymore. They checked their guns and blades, then went to the building they thought the monster was hiding in.

“Okay, here’s the plan,” Dean whispered, “Sam, circle around to the back. Cas, you stay with me and-“

There was a scream from inside. Castiel didn’t think twice before he ran in. The girl needed help now.

“Cas!” He didn’t stop. He couldn’t let her die.

He ran through the halls until he found the source of her screams. He shoved the door open.

The girl was strapped to a table with cuts all over her. To Castiel’s shock, it wasn’t a monster torturing her. It was a man, her boyfriend. Castiel had interviewed him with Dean a few hours ago.

“No,” Castiel cried as he smirked and cut the girls throat. Two shots rang out and he fell.

Castiel could feel Dean’s anger radiating from behind him

“I-” “Go to the car,” Dean snapped. Castiel looked at his feet as he walked. He could hear Dean yelling from outside. There was complete silence on the drive to the motel. Castiel didn’t know what to do or say. Dean was still seething when they got out of the car. “I didn’t mean to hurt her,” Castiel finally said.

“Damn it, Cas!” Dean yelled. “You never mean to do anything. Can you do anything right?”

“I’m sorry, Dean.”

“Sorry isn’t gonna bring that girl back!” Dean snapped. “Fuck!”

He stormed off toward the motel room. Cas was biting his lower lip when Sam turned to look at him. He turned away.

“I’m going for a walk,” he said, quietly.

“Cas,” Sam started, but Castiel ignored him as he disappeared into the dark. Sam stormed into the room. Dean was drinking a beer, looking madder than hell.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!”

Sam demanded.

“He’s the reason that girl is dead!”

“It was an accident, Dean. We’ve made those mistakes before. You really hurt his feelings.”

“Oh, boo hoo. He’ll be fine.”

Sam pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed.

“You know what Dean? You keep treating Cas like this, and he’s just gonna shut down and give up.”

Dean stared at him.

“You don’t really he would?”

“He’s thought about it before hasn’t he? He’s been through a lot of bad shit, Dean.”

“What did he see in that dream that fucked him up so bad?” Dean asked. Sam ran a hand through his hair.

“You.”

“What about me?”

“He saw you, Dean. He was with you. You two were married and living a normal life. You were having Christmas with Mom and Dad when I got there.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah.” Dean just sat there for a while before he spoke again.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“He asked me not to. He knew it would weird you out.” Dean bit his lip.

“Where is he?”

“He went for a walk. I don’t know where.”

“I’m gonna go find him. I need to talk to him.”

“Dean, if you say anything to him-”

“I’m not going to. I just need to talk him. Alone.”

Dean walked out the door, leaving Sam to hope he didn’t screw Cas up even worse.


	6. Chapter 6

Dean found Cas at the nearby playground, sitting on a bench, staring at nothing.

"We’ve gotta stopping meeting like this," Dean said, when he was close enough. "People are going to think we’re freaks."

"Are you here to yell at me again?" Castiel sniffed. "Because I’d rather you not."

Dean sighed and sat down next to him.

"I’m not here to yell. I’m sorry that I yelled at all. You didn’t deserve that."

"I messed up."

"Yeah. But I’ve messed up, too. So has Sam. So did my dad and so has every other hunter in history. You can’t save everyone, remember?" Castiel smiled a little.

They sat in silence for a while before Dean spoke.

"Sam told me. About your dream." Castiel turned to look at him, fear and betrayal in his eyes.

"I asked him not to."

"Why?"

"I knew it would freak you out. And I couldn’t lose you again." Castiel looked away. "I understand if you want me to leave." Dean bit his lip.

"I’m going to try something," He said. "Just…don’t move, okay?"

He put a hand around the back of Castiel’s neck, angling his head how he wanted it before he leaned in.

The kiss was brief. Dean pulled back after only a second. When he leaned back in, Castiel placed a hand on his chest.

"Don’t do that unless you mean it," He said, looking up at Dean. The sadness in his eyes made Dean’s heart ache.

"I mean it. I…I’ve thought about it, y’know. So if you want to give us a try, then so do I."

"I do," Castiel said, gripping Dean jacket. "Please."

Dean looked at Castiel, searching his face. He apparently found what he wanted because they kissed again. And again. Over and over until they were both breathless.

He felt like he should more, but he wasn’t good with feelings. Apparently what he said was enough because Castiel smiled so wide his own face hurt.

"Let’s go back to the motel," Dean said, touching the other man’s face. "You’re freezing."

They walked hand in hand back to the building. Dean decided to get them a separate room from Sam so they didn’t weird him out too much. He sent Castiel straight there and went to get their stuff.

Sam jumped up when he walked in. He frowned when he didn’t see Castiel with him.

"Did you not find him?"

"I found him. We talked."

"Then where is he? I swear, Dean, if you fucked him up anymore than he already was-"

"I kissed him," Dean interupted. "Because I’ve wanted to for a long time. We have a room a few doors over." Sam blinked.

"Oh."

"Yeah." Dean grabbed their bags from under the bed and stood up. "Anything else?"

"No. I’ll see you guys tomorrow." They said goodnight and Dean joined Cas in their room.

Castiel was sitting on the bed, flipping through TV channels. Dean sat on the bed with him, wrapping his arms around him.

"See anything good?"

"Not really."

"That’s too bad," Dean said, tilting his head around to get closer to Cas’s lips. "We’ll have to find something else to do."

They kissed, slow and deep. Castiel knew these kisses and where they led. He had kissed his dream Dean a million times like this. When Dean broke the kiss, Cas caught his bottom lip and nipped it lightly. Dean moaned quietly.

"How did you know I liked that?" Dean asked. Castiel made an uncomfortable face and shifted. "Oh."

"He liked it. I know you inside and out. The djinn used my knowledge of you to build him. It combined you with what I wanted."

"Tell me about him." Castiel shook his head.

"That’s over now. It wasn’t real."

"Cas, I need to know what you like and how he treated you and what you expect from this." Dean ran his fingers over his cheek. "Please."

"In my dream, I was human. We met in high school and got together in college. We got married the summer before the dream started. He cared for me in every way possible. We made love every chance we had. He was gentle and loving. I had this stuffed animal that he won for me that I carried around like a child."  
Castiel went on for a little while about his months with dream Dean. Dean nodded as he listened. “The weird thing was, he told all of these stories, and I knew them, but I didn’t have the actual memory, you know?” Dean nodded.

"I can’t promise you everything he did. I’m rough and I’ll probably break you heart so many times before this over with. I can’t promise you anything except that I want this and I’m willing to be whoever you need me to be."

"He wasn’t the Dean I am in love with. I know who you are and I don’t want anyone else."

Dean smiled and kissed him lightly. They shifted to lay next to each other. Dean twisted their fingers together as they talked. Somewhere along the line, Castiel dozed off against Dean’s chest.

Dean made Sam ride in the back on the way home.

Sam glared at the back of their heads as his legs started to cramp in the small space. Sure, he was happy for them, but he was sure as hell taller than them, too.

~*~

Cas moved into Dean’s room in the bunker.

He didn’t have a lot of personal stuff yet, so it was pretty easy. Dean offered to clear off a wall for him to hang his stuff, but Castiel liked Dean’s guns and records. He didn’t have anything anyway.

Dean had forgotten how much he liked waking up to someone. Cas slept later than he did, so Dean watched him sleep, smiling a little when a little noise slipped out of his mouth.

Castiel decided he would rather be a researcher than a hunter. Dean and Sam shared his number with other hunters and Cas stayed pretty busy when they were gone.

Dean liked coming home, now. He wished he less jobs and more time to make up for all that he lost with Castiel through the years. He loved walking in late from a hunt and having someone to climb into bed next to. Someone that understood his nightmares and ghost and had his own to fight, too. Castiel was the piece of him that had been missing for so long.

"What’s this?" Castiel asked, one day. Dean looked up and saw him eyeing the gift that was sitting on their bed.

"I dunno. Maybe you should open it and see." Castiel made a face at him and opened the bag.

"Dean." Dean stood up and wrapped his arms around Cas’s waist as the man looked at the stuffed animal in his hands.

"I don’t know what your dream one looked like, but I figured all giraffes kinda look the same."

"It’s perfect. Thank you."

"I love you." It was the first time Dean had said it to him. Castiel had said the words endless times, but Dean had never been able to work up the nerve.

"I love you, too." Castiel kissed him and Dean grinned against his lips.

"Awesome. Want to watch the Exorcist now?"

"Of course, Dean. Go and get everything set up. I’ll be there in a moment." Dean smacked a kiss onto his cheek before heading to the living room.

Castiel smiled at the stuffed animal and placed it on his of the bed.

He didn’t need a safety blanket anymore. He had his hunter to take care of him.


End file.
